Humble

Practice:

Even though the semester is nearing the end, I am glad that the yoga poses are just as fresh and challenging as they were in the beginning weeks of class. Having the class day on Thursday to learn new poses was fun. But its so crazy how hard some things are! When we were doing to pose that was basically a side plank with an outstretched leg held by our "sloth fingers", my sides were and abs were totally feeling the burn lol. And by the end of those poses, I was pretty out of breath--guess that means i need to start working out more =/

Reading:

While I was reading chapters 9-12, I couldn't help but feel a sense of awe. It was actually really humbling to read how much devotion to God is really stressed. You really become aware of the deep love and devotion is present between the humble servant and God. It kind of makes me feel like a bad Christian lol. There is DEF not that much commitment between me and my God, but reading these examples of how to love and worship God gives me a renewed take on spirituality. For some reason, I really did get the urge to start being more humble and pure. Its cool to see how the readings affect me emotionally/psychologically--very intriguing. :)

A Deep Realization; The Crying in Class

Practice:

I really enjoy the open atmosphere our class has during our yoga practice. Its actually a little energizing and motivating to have a class that, for the most part, is in unison about being excited to learn a few new aspects of yoga. I appreciate that Dr. Schultz allows us to make suggestions about which yoga practices we would like to work on. It was nice to have an entire class day devoted to practicing poses that addressed specific parts of our bodies that we were having pains with or were acting rebellious in regards to our body (like our shoulders or lower backs).

Although I'm sure she would not call herself a yoga guru, Dr. Schultz's ability to understand the philosophy of yoga and yoga poses never ceases to amaze me. I thought it was totally awesome when we explained what parts of our body were bothering us and immediately she would respond with "Okay well for that area of the body we can do....." or "It is best to practice these poses....and if that doesn't work you should also try...". Pretttttyyy cool if you ask me. What was even more amazing to me was the fact that even though my shoulders or back weren't hurting previously, I could feel my muscles stretching and my joints becoming even more relaxed than they already were.

Reading Response:

Up until this week, reading the Bhagavad Gita has been really nothing more than just a reading and a appreciation for a new look on another culture. When I showed up to class and realized I had to pick a section of the book that stood out to me, I could only think of one section.

I was in a relationship with my ex for 8 years. During that time I had made him one of the biggest parts of my life; I made him my everything and, naturally, I had a vision of my future with him. It wasn't until the second week of school when I noticed that there was a distance between me and him. His new behavior was extremely different from what it had been in the summer (and the other past years); I had no idea what was going on between us, and was only left to think that maybe, just maybe, his distance was a cause from all the stress of coming back to school and the pressure for his December graduation. Three weeks ago I met him at his apartment to confront him about his behavior and three hours after I had arrived, I was sitting in my car with a broken heart crying. He dumped me. In short he ended up saying verbatim, and I kid you not, "I am only interested in myself right now. And I would rather hang out with my friends right now....I've decided that you are better off without me". I didn't see it coming. And its a phrase that literally haunts me everyday.... He hasn't talked to me since.

 When I had first read this section of chapter 3, I felt extremely mad. Anything I read and everything I saw only reminded me of him. It was always the same cycle: frustration, anger, EXTREME anger, confusion, sadness, crying, depression, more confusion, frustration.... blah blah.

But rereading the section in class brought on a response that I did not foresee. It wasn't until it was two people until my turn to read in class that I began to feel an overwhelming sense of guilt. I don't think I have ever despised someone so much in my life. I don't recall ever having this knot of anger in my chest and throat. I feel like it is so involuntary. I do not wish to have bad thoughts about others, even if they are the biggest jerks in the world.... but I hate him. How could he do this to me? How could he trick me like this and just throw me away??...... By the time my turn came, I read a version of the following passage in a choked up voice:

"It is selfish desire and anger, arising from the guna of rajas; these are the appetites and evils which threaten a person in this life."

And then before I knew it, the tears were coming, my throat completely closed up, and my emotions were out on display for the entire class AND my professor. (SUPER embarrasing -_- )Anger and selfish desire--they are the reasons that one cannot ever proceed in life. They threaten our wellbeing; threaten our sanity; corrupt our soul. And its so true! When I read the passage out loud, it became completely clear to me that I will never be able to move on in life until I rid myself of this anger and sadness. It really is holding me back. And I want nothing more than to just move on to a happier point in my life.... but its so hard. And the fact that it IS that hard is what made me cry for what was, pretty much, the rest of the day and week. I have NO IDEA how in the world I was able to keep my emotions at bay for the remainder of the class period...'cause let me tell you, it would have been bad if I wouldn't have.

Who knows how long this process will take. But these readings are actually helping me out in further understanding myself and some aspects in life. Sorry if I may have made the class awkward for a moment or two!

Post of the Week:

Reading: 

The concept of reincarnation is so interesting to me. I thought it was funny to see that I wasn't the only one in class who is somewhat confused by the subject. The in-class discussions always stimulate my thinking. The problem is, is that as soon as I am introduced to a new concept, I want to immediately understand all of it, right then and there. And what is most frustrating to me in this class, is having NO CLUE on how to understand these sutras -_- At first when we are introduced to these sutras at the beginning of class I am completely lost. And the only thing going through my mind is ".....What??? ughhhh...and what does THIS mean??" And then some of my questions are answered when Dr. Schultz is briefly explaining the sutras, but my problem is, not being able to understand these sutras as a whole. I feel like over the next few weeks I will barely be able to understand these sutras and then, wham!, we get introduced into another set of yoga philosophy excerpts! How do I handle it all??

Practice:

It's crazy how stiff my body becomes when I miss a class of yoga! Last class I was really struggling to do all the "simple" stretches like downward facing dog and the triangle poses. Ugh! Lol. It was definitely something I was not used to.

So this past weekend I went up to Dallas and brought back my puppy to stay with me in Waco. And  while I was doing my homework I noticed him get up from his cat nap and stretch the infamous pose we have all been trying to conquer: downward facing dog. It was funny because as soon as I saw him do this, I  immediately got up from my seat and sat down by him and tried to study his form for as long as I could before he resumed his normal stance. And let me tell you, I was AMAZED! My puppy completely shifted ALL of his weight to his behind like it was NOTHING. So I tried the pose myself to see how far I could get, and sadly I have to say, I was no where close. I thought it was really funny to get pushed back into that reality of understanding that yoga takes a lot more practice than what I do during class time. (Most of the time in class, I get fooled into thinking that the poses I'm doing are spot on to the correct form and technique. It isn't until I get corrected by Dr. Schultz, or my puppy, that I realize I still have a long way to go.) So after this revelation, I realized that 1.) I pretty much suck at downward dog, lol and 2.) I need to take yoga into a daily practice of at least two poses (one of them being downward dog) in order to, I feel, truly start understanding the poses and why they help us achieve self acknowledgement. In order to start on this, I vowed to my puppy, that for every time he decided to stretch in his dog-like ways, I would attempt to do a proper downward facing dog pose. Who knows how long this will last though! He seems to stretch at least once every hour that I'm with him. lol.

: One :

Reading:

Well that's surprising! I would have never guessed that the book we have to read (HOY) is SO easy to read! It almost feels like I am in elementary school reading some easy comprehension book that I picked out from the book fair. But although I like how it is an easy read, I am wanting something with a little more complexity to the story. =/

I think it is nice how the journey that the captain is going through somewhat parallels our journey as students. Its nice to be able to receive another explanation of what yoga means for the body and mind. (Dr. Schultz gives us an understanding in class through her discussion and guidance, we learn a small understanding of yoga through the practice itself, and then another understanding through the narrative of the story.)

Discussing the sutras in class only produced more questions than answers. -_- Are we always in some state of yoga? Is it really possible to still the fluctuations of the mind? I asked Dr. Schultz if she had ever been able to "abide in her own true nature" and she said yes. But how do you get there? What does it feel like? How long does it usually take one to get there? ?????!! ugh. I know it was the first day of learning, but sure seems like a really confusing place to start :(

Practice:

THERE IS NO WAY I CAN STAND ON ONE LEG!!! its crazy! I tried SO HARD and I just kept wobbling! (And it completely gave my calfs major cramping...) It was still fun though. :) The next day I kept on wondering "Why am I so sore??? Surely it can't be from the yoga--I barely did anything!" After the yoga practice I was walking back to my car and realized that my body felt energized. I felt like I had an awareness of all my muscles that I never bothered to notice before? Ha. kind of cool :)

: Intro :

Soooooooo..."Parsing Yoga" is the blog I will be using to express my thoughts and understandings of this class. Hopefully, my posts will interest some of you and/or offer some other perceptions that you, yourself, had not originally come across through the class practice and readings.

A little bit about me:

My name is Brooke Martinez. I live in Rowlett, TX (45 min. east of Dallas) and love taking trips home to see my family and puppy. I'm super chill, and pretty shy. But like anybody says, "once you get to know me, I'm pretty fun". I am a senior majoring in Architecture and although I would love to graduate this upcoming spring with my fellow classmates, my major requires me to continue taking my 5th year of college at Washington University in St. Louise, Missouri. All by myself. :(

I'm not really a huge blogger/computer person, so this experience will be fairly new and somewhat challenging. (I can't even keep up with Facebook/Twitter/ or person texting on my phone.) I originally took this Capstone because it was the only one that worked with my schedule. I have to admit, at first, I was really sad to not be able to take a class with Tatum. I took a class with him for the first time of my BIC career last semester and really liked his teaching style and character. He was awesome.

SO, when I signed up for this course, I was already in bad spirits--anything with the word PHILOSOPHY in the title reminds me of that God-awful Social World class I took a few years ago; I felt like I learned nothing in that class when that semester ended. -_-

Once Dr. Schultz put the syllabus on BlackBoard for us during the summer, I was pretty excited to see that instead of talking about philosophy every class day for 50-75 min and practicing yoga for 15-20 min, the course was, in fact, the other way around. I have never had the chance to practice yoga before, let alone, think about the philosophy that corresponds with it. Being able to learn yoga techniques and actually understand what it means is pretty exciting for me. I know it sounds cheesy but at the end of this semester I hope to appreciate life more. From what I've heard, yoga isn't easy to master. It requires strength, persistence, practice, patience, and understanding. I'm pretty sure that if I can actually learn to use these skills together for the yoga practice, I can obtain an understanding as to how to use these skills properly in the "outside world".

I guess we'll have to see where I end up in a few months!